February 7th 2014 I wrote this… Funny how a few months can feel like light years away.
Nothing is pulling on my heart strings at the moment
The up and downs that had become my adaptation of balanced,
Have been replaced with a nauseating lull.
Something that I can’t control,
Something I cannot start and stop however much I may want to
It’s true that things find you when you have stopped seeking them.
That absence makes you weary of something you may not have wanted,
When you had it.
Finding the adventure in a lull is an art form.
It is true talent, and pure genius to see past a moment that is currently unmoving
All while recognizing that even whilst still,
It is these moments that matter.
Knowing how to find the freedom in a situation that was not created on your own terms,
Is acknowledging true inner peace.
When you can lay still and wonder where the day will take you,
Without wanting to take the day –
That is a gift.
Are we ever experiencing life on life’s terms when we are battling for the reigns?
There are no clear boundaries that define how often we should
Throw our hands in the air
and how often we should let things slip
Between the curves of our fingers.
To live fully in stillness,
To find something breathtaking in the uninspiring,
That is the biggest challenge in the world.