Gravel and Stone

There was a time in my life, not a long time ago
that all I could feel was a longing for laughter

Months and days ago, but just a few
I forgot what it felt like to really laugh, a hard laugh
One that trickles down from a smile, into the pit of your stomach
Resonates through your chest and continues for much too long

And I said,
“Sometimes, I just wish I could feel something so much that it made me laugh so hard I cried… Sometimes I wish I had these uncontrollable giggles, because I think that they felt good, I think, but I just don’t know”

So months, and some days ago
severe gloom gathered in what had once been bright eyes,
and stood, complacent yet exhausting
and the gloom refused to falter
But my bright eyes refused to give in

Days and hours ago, my cheeks ached from a day of happiness
Fingertips once plagued with words only known to a piece of paper,
once again felt the vibration of music hit them

Felt something so strongly it made me move,
and hours and minutes ago, I laughed until I cried.
I danced until I couldn’t stand,
and there was never a moment in which
I remembered the solemn gloom I had once known

And that is how it comes, in waves
We break down, and crawl
Crawl for as long as it takes, and we get by for as long as it takes
Just by going through the motions, just until we can get back up
And dance again, until our feet go numb
Cry again, from laughter you cannot control
Sing again, to a beat that makes you whole
Love again, to a life that’s beautiful.


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