A Bit Enlightened

So this post is different because I didn’t pull out my notepad in the middle of the day to jot a thought down… and then come back to it later to expand.
I didn’t write a full “poem” in my phone or on my computer and then copy and paste it onto here.

Tonight I am just going with the flow. I always liked people’s blogs who just talked about their days. Some people think what I write about is brave… but the real courage comes from those who just pull up their blog and write whatever comes to mind. It’s brave to just ramble and think that it deserves a spot somewhere floating in the world wide web where it might be found!

As per my previous posts, things have been a little bit, turbulent lately. I guess you could call it that. Starting a new job, in a rainy and cold season, while still fighting for closure with previous people, places and things… it is a lot to take in. Sometimes I find it hard to believe that I am managing the daily processes of a store, and some of it’s employees when I can barely manage my own emotions and feelings. But being at work has always helped me keep my mind off those things, and taken me into a mode where all I know is to just “do.”

No thinking, no wondering, no questioning, just “doing.”
Work I guess is where I do that most, where I am forced to take action without overthinking, forced to make a decision without pondering it for days. Work makes me more concise.

I am posting today because I finally feel as though things are starting to come together. My confidence is at a better level than usual, because I am starting to see hard work turn into accomplishments. When you are working hard every day all while personally trying to keep yourself sane, it gets discouraging not to have accomplishments. Baby steps, and now I am getting somewhere. With work, and with myself. I even tried something new last night.

I have a lust for music, and a lust for words. Somehow I never was able to really put those two things together creatively but last night I developed a sort of… melody.. for one of the pieces I have written. (it’s not posted yet but it will be my next post)
So I recorded myself singing my words (terribly… I’m a writer, not a singer)and today sent it over to a friend who has great musical talent and I am kind of excited for where this may go. Even if he says its the most awful thing he has ever heard, it was nice to expand my writing into something else that I really love.

For now, it is off to save my father. He left me a voicemail frantic today…. he needs Christmas present ideas for Mom. It is less then 3 days until Christmas! I obviously owe my ability to work well under pressure to good ol’ pops.

Thank you for reading, and thank you for sharing.

xoxo Shel


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