Retrospect and Regret

There is a fine line,
dashed, dotted, blurred
between retrospect and regret.
Where indecencies that make you cringe,
may also make you more
Put you closer to the person you are,
supposed to be.
Brings you nearer to the purity,
hidden beneath self-loathing expressions
of the pain that you hid.
There is meaning in the mess,
that became your world
when you made all of it up.
When envy drives you mad,
because you envy not what you never had,
but what you once lost.
Hindsight is a bliss,
a vision in rose, lightly shaded pink
But are you yearning for what you had,
or creating a display for your own mind?
There are lines, dashed, scratched –
plans ruined, cut short and destroyed.
Yet the absence of those has gotten you,
here. Right here.
Closer to knowing right and wrong,
closer to knowing yourself.
Living in retrospect,
must be a hard battle to win,
but a bullet to bite,
is to live in regret.
to mistakenly view all of those mistakes,
as mistakes.
After all we live our lives separately,
we learn on our own,
and maybe the past is there not to remind us
of our inefficiencies and mishaps,
but to tell our story of triumph and learning.
I am always learning,
learning that from here on,
things will be different than they had been before.
Learning that the past is the past,
for better or for worse,
and letting go of it is the only way,
to truly do something different.

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